Let’s talk New Year’s resolutions. We’ve all created them with varying degrees of success and failure. According to Finder.com, Boomers’ resolutions tend to be related to self-improvement and health. If you happen to be close to retirement, you may resolve to be prepared for shift away from working.
Last year, your resolutions didn’t include how to be your best self during a COVID outbreak. Your retirement planning may have been upended as you focused on supporting kids and grandkids through the pandemic.
How do you create resolutions given that impacts from COVID will likely be hanging around in 2021?
While it is important to have goals related to self-improvement, health, and retirement, this year has shown me the importance of creating goals to stay connected with friends and family. The holidays were a challenge for me as I enjoy having big holiday parties, attending events like the Nutcracker, shopping in bustling malls, and eating at great restaurants. None of which were available during 2020.
I came across a great book on my shelf, “The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. It was truly inspirational in getting me through the holidays and as I create goals for 2021. My top languages are Quality Time ad Physical Touch.
Here is a quick overview of the love languages:
- Quality Time: Uninterrupted and focused time together
- Act of Service: People want to help you or contribute to things you feel are important
- Physical Touch: Non-verbal communication such as holding hands, hugs, other acts of intimacy
- Words of Affirmation: Verbal expression to affirm, encourage, show appreciation
- Receiving Gifts: Thoughtful gifts and gestures
Knowing your own preferences and the preferences of other’s is especially helpful. Most people give gifts consistent with their own love languages. The main love languages of a dear friend are Acts of Service and Quality Time. She was complaining that she has provided so much to her grown children—college education, support of the grandkids during COVID, dream vacations—and she doesn’t understand why they won’t come over to help shovel the snow and stay for a chat afterwards. It turns out they think she prefers Receiving Gifts based on the gifts she gets from them during the year.
My top languages are Physical Touch and Quality Time, but my 14-year-old boy is all about Words of Affirmation and Receiving Gifts. Hoping that my 14-year-old son had any interest in hanging out with mom was silly—so I needed to find other ways to get my quality time needs met! I got creative and found a way to have family game night once a week that gave me Quality Time while playing new games we gave our son (Receiving Gifts). I was able to say how much I appreciated (Words of Affirmation) that he put his phone down during that time plus give kudo’s when he taught me how to play!
How does this relate to resolutions for 2021?
In addition to the resolutions you planned for 2021, why not take on some new ones to have more fun, laughter, and feeling “loved” by exploring how to use the 5 Love Languages?
Being focused on “getting healthier” can be dull, boring, and even frustrating. When we feel loved, we are more likely to take better care of ourselves and be more proactive about the future.
Your money personality also plays a big role in your success towards New Year’s resolutions. Some personality types tend to be leadership and risk oriented (Ruler, Celebrity, Maverick), some are dreamers (Alchemist and Romantic) and while Nurturers, Connectors, and Accumulators are busy taking care of other people. As you can imagine, a Maverick would not want a holiday gift or experience that involves being nurtured, and an Accumulator would not want something extravagant from a Romantic.
To have 2021 be even more meaningful for you and others around you, make a resolution to learn about the 5 Love Languages or your Money Personality to create the best memories possible for yourself, friends, and family.
You can take the quiz for the 5 Love Languages here https://www.5lovelanguages.com/.
To learn more about your Money Personality, take our quiz and visit us at www.shemoolah.com to register for a class.
Want ideas for gift giving by love languages click here Love Language Gift Guide: Gift Ideas for Love Language Types